Scare-a-thon 2007

Lookie, a new e-chron postage. Who knows, maybe this will rebecome a regular thing for me.

The past weekend we went to a park to help make things pretty. I know I do a super job at that, personally, for the crusty pizza boxes and filthy socks that I'll probably wear tomorrow are organized in a very feng sh-way... heheh, get it?

It was a fun time, although it wasn't nearly as involved as last year's excursion to the outskirts of Beijing, or Jingy-town as it likes to be called. Nevertheless, it was still a joyous romp. I attended to see my Alaska class hard at work doing good for the environment. They really put their backs into it. In fact, I have some grossly outrageous photos to highlight some of the best samples of child-labor one is likely to see.

Our plan that day was to do some good for the world (clean parks, help old ladies cross streets, reunite puppy orphans with their families, etc.) and then go take some spooky pictures at an abandoned theme park that I read about in that's beijing. Unfortunately it became more of a recon mission, as we weren't actually able to find any of the buses that were supposed to deliver us. All the better though, we spent the rest of the day playing a 20-questions-ish game until said game erupted into a fiery religious debate. Too bad it seems like it's almost impossible to say the words "religious debate" without being preempted with the word "fiery".

I've made it a goal of mine to try to watch at least one scary movie per night after the October break leading up to Halloween. Of course, I keep to that oath more-so than I keep to more productive oaths like promises to visit friends on weekends or trying to workout or eat healthy on a regular basis. The result has been some weird dreams that tie most genres together, such as vampire werewolf zombies fighting ax-wielding maniacs. In essence, this means it's working.

This week, we're having a spooky movie scare-a-thon. Every night leading up to Saturday will and has been one scary movie party. God I love Halloween.

In other news, as some of you may or may not know, Dan Hubball will be visiting Beijing very soon. The date is rapidly approaching, and I'm trying my best to prepare lots of China things to do. I hope he brings Ribena though. I mean, I like him and all, but I'll be danged if I don't also like sugar-flavored black currant juice a whole crapload as well.

More to come. By the way, all the photos from the day can be located here.

PS: I just read Dave Reidy's blog. He's in India now. Mumbai. He got malaria. He's sick, but it sounds like he'll pull through. So... Mom? Dad? Wanna meet in Mumbai over February break instead of Canada?

PPS: I wanted to try the video uploader through blogger. If you can see it, this video is a 3d-itized version of the Great Wall photo from a year ago. Can't link to the original, because blogger is blocked AGAIN!

The Policeman Remind

Click on it to hugify.

There it is. The new comic, for all to see. I feel so vulnerable, but at least it's not even not much worse than the last one, I suppose. I think that maybe my comicking is mainly for personal venting, and may make me laugh, but that's all I'm after anyway. Catharsis.

This one is about the recent news of the WTO tightening its grip on piracy in China. While, in theory, I'm against stealing for the reason that maybe might possibly I'll sent to eternal damnation with the thieves, murderers and whoremongers (see Revelations 21:8... Thanks alot Mrs. Norris), I can't help but wonder what will happen to the entertainment avenues in China as a whole. I mean, where will people get there fun without it involving The Rock and/or special effects in some way? Mahjong? Friendly social outings with other human beings?! PLEASE! Also, the comic is a throwback to the hilariously mistranslated sign about not being a thief in Zhongguancun.

Anyway, recently we had a party in honor of Cory and Dave's Tax Day/Birthday Extravaganza and it was a boatload of fun. Lots and lots compadres from work showed up, representing both countries, and we had good times with the completely and totally legit Nintendo Wii and games that I bought totally LEGALLY! (Just wanted to make that clear). It's amazing to see someone who's never played it pick up the remote, examine it intently, and then proceed to flick it around with incredible uncertainty. It brought to mind that scene in 2001: A Space Odyssey, when the monkey-men (fresh from their session with the brain-boosting monolith) start realizing they can use tools for the first time. Yeah, not exactly the nicest comparison to make of my friends... with movie-monkeys. But if it makes it better, I went through the same process, except I was in an EBGames surrounded by total strangers.

Positive Role Model For the Children

So the Wii is fun and all, but there are some lines I'm not sure I'm ready to cross. I mean, I've crossed it already, I guess, but I didn't feel comfortable about it once I became self-aware.

I made this as a pilot comic, so to speak. It really didn't take nearly as long as I thought it would have, and I like it personally. As I mentioned ephemerally before, I think some of the more ridiculous scenarios that happen in China or just in general aren't best explained in text form. The absurdity of some situations, I feel, can only be truly expressed (by me personally) in a ridiculous way. I guess this is ridiculous as any.

Back in college times, my friends and I used to draw pictures on each other's dry-erase boards. This was good fun, and it provided an outlet for expressing the aforementioned absurdities of each other's behavior, and/or the absurdities of life. Usually it was done in the passive/aggressive sense, and I could imagine a scenario in which future comics of mine take on this approach at dealing with issues that crop up in life. Funny or not, I think I'll keep doing it. Let me know what you think, though, whoever's out there.

This particular pilot comic (I'm too shy to put it up on the front page yet... I mean, it's pretty rough), as I said before, has nothing to do with China. It's actually something I've caught myself doing before. It's the marriage between a song I've had stuck in my head for the past few days, and playing Godfather: Blackhand Edition for the Wii. I caught myself joyfully crooning the happy (and educational!) song, while participating in gesture-controlled activities such as extorting barbershop owners, smashing up their stores with baseball bats, and subsequently having a shootout with the coppers. Once I realized how jubilant I was behaving while conducting these despicable acts (albiet virtually), I had to take a step back and reevaluate my sanity. After an intensive review, I can safely - and objectively - conclude that I'm still sane. Everyone can relax now.

And just so you know, Mom and Dad will likely know the other time this happened: During Christmas a few years back, they could here cries of anguish from my room while I was mowing down supervillains in No One Lives Forever while whistling jolly Christmas carols. Good times were had by most!

Is that the best you got?!

So the sandstorm hit and OH MY GOD!! Look at the pics!!!



BEFORE THIS LONG POST -- I need to let everyone know that I can post in China right now, but I can't freaking comment. If that's not back-asswards, I don't know what is. But thanks for the comments everyone!

Insanity! It was impossible to breate, much less survive. The mere exposure to the harsh climates peels the coloration from your retinas, inducing a piercing blue tint to your eyes much like the spice in "Dune". Mere surgical masks does little to... umm... delay the inevitable... err...

Ok, April Fools. And a day late, no less.

Of course, the images are photoshopped. Not only photoshopped, but done so in an amateurish way that would make my teachers at the Art Institute disown my one year of intensive artistic training. The sandstorm did nothing. As a matter of fact, the next day was beautiful. Clear skies, clouds, you name it. I think I even saw a blue-bird on someone's shoulder. So much for Beijing living up to the hype. Gah!

Speaking of science-fiction, I've been watching Dr. Who. This campy, yet highly entertaining, new romp in old fashioned sci-fi worlds doubles as a metaphor for traveling. Kind of like how Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy did and yes, I'm sure, the original Dr. Who T.V. series. But this one really has a lot of interesting aspects that equates to what I experience while traveling. With the uncertainty, the culture shock, the exploration, and how they handle contact of one of the main characters with her family back home, who neither know where she is, or when she is. The whole premise is based around traveling through time and space to distant... times and spaces.

The whole purpose of traveling in my personal experience has little to nothing to do with "finding yourself" as many people believe it does, and more with just seeing all you can see, and challenging yourself in ways that you simply can't be challenged academically or physically (not that I frequently challenge myself in the latter). Thrusting yourself into a situation of uncertainty and almost total exclusion from anything you're comfortable with or accustomed to. It's the ultimate in uprooting yourself.

In addition to academic challenges, I feel that this is one of the most worthy endeavors that anyone could do. I need to stress "anyone", because it's not just me that I feel this relates to. Sure, I've loved traveling to the point of scary addiction since the whole European Extravaganza back in aught-2, but I think this experience is oft overlooked as being something that "gets in the way of real life". I, of course, profoundly disagree. Seeing how you handle yourself in these situations, and seeing just how much your own behavior differs from those around you (when you're TOTALLY surrounded by it) allows you to be able to be more aware of your abilities and limitations. Which is why, I must say, I'm especially proud of Ma, Pa, and my dearest older brother, Nukie. They ventured to the lands of the Scots and the Brits, and enjoyed it. I have to be honest, it surprised me a little. Even more of a shock, Dad liked Hong Kong. Hong... Kong. Not just a city, a big ol' city. Full of people. And he only managed to embarrass me only about half the time. Shocking.

Oh, but I ramble. This was mainly a post to say that traveling should be done by all. I don't want to here any moaning about, "Oh, but I can't. It would be nice to travel and piss away my life rambling about the globe, but I've got my future to think about." I got news for you, buddy (er... buddies), especially you younger types. The average amount of time an American changes his or her job is 5 times in their lifetime. At some point during those 5 changes, find some time to travel somewhere and experience all the craziness first hand. Just a few months, maybe a year. If you despise it, at least you'll be better off. Unless you get malaria. Which is why you should go prepared. And who knows?! Maybe you'll FIND yourself!

The End is Nigh

Sandstorm expected to hit tonight and tomorrow. If there's truth to this, expect the next update to have post-apocalyptic fun and joy for all. In photo form. God, sometimes I wish I didn't have to work Saturdays...

The Absence of Christmas

It's getting interesting here in Beijing now that it's nearing the winter time and the pollution days are becoming ever more frequent. Waking up to ashy grays looming on the horizon on a regular basis, its making me try to remember what green looks like. I'm not complaining really, just stating fact. I knew it would be like this, so I'm not surprised in the least. It was inevitable, Mr. Anderson. Add the fact that Christmas is rapidly approaching, and I couldn't be more oblivious to the fact. The stark absence of holiday cheer is quite interesting. While it would probably be a bummer to most, I find the existence in a society in which Christmas is just the faintest murmur among the few foreigners peppered throughout Beijing just one of those life-enriching moments.

Classes are going just fine, and it's weird to actually see kids growing. There are alot of things that have really surprised me about spending all this time with kids, that being one of them. But memories of myself being that age are actually coming back pretty strong. When I see a kid in class sort of talking to himself and speaking gibberish (not Chinese, I swear) it reminds me of myself when I was that age. And some other things, like I don't remember loose teeth in my own jaw freaking me out as a kid, but seeing another kid with a tooth that's about to fall out really makes me cringe for some reason. It's pretty shocking to me that I reacted that way. Either way, it's staggeringly impressive to see just how far the kids have come with English. They're geniuses. I dote, I dote. But here, not only are they smart little tykes, but they're staggeringly cute. Just take a look at these two pictures.

That's Rain, wearing Annie's glasses, and Kaylee, daydreaming about something. They've set the bar pretty high in terms of how cute kids can be. The worst part is that they know it, so they can work an angle to get away with being little bastards sometimes. Us softy teachers are so easily manipulated.

This, contrasted with the shocking spectacle of the bizarrely (yet aptly) named "Beijing Acrobat Macrocosm" show that Laura Kavazanjian, Lauren, and Laura's friend from home went to. I thought about that whilst watching little kids bend around in shocking ways and flip around like... I don't know, like some sort of supernatural flippy creatures. I mean, these kids are going to have some serious bone, muscle, and body issues. When you are able to bend over backward and balance yourself with the sole power of your jaw muscles, I'm pretty sure that's one thing that wasn't really intended for the human body to do. Just take a gander


Yeah. Ouch. Not alot of room for error there.

I've been spending alot of time away from home. Everything is pretty surreal because of it, I'm used to copius "me" time, and I'm being more of a socialite than I've ever been ever ever. It's all fun and good, especially since recently some of this quality hang out time has been at the absolutely beautiful location known as The Bookworm that lets you play the absolutely divine piano there and is one of the very few places that has Guiness and Bass. The only problem is that all this action is making me really exhausted. But I'm becoming accustomed to it relatively quickly, and it's great to have such a variety of things to do now in my life. Plus, when you go out, you can come across such awe-inspiring moments as these:


"The policeman remind," I will ruin your life if you commit all sorts of crime. He's so jovial looking. He derives much pleasure in punishing you severely. Now you see how they work here in China!

Well, I'll end this rather anticlimatic e-chron with a picture of me chilling with my homie Santa:

Yo yo yo! Merry Christmas!

A Wrinkle in Time

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