Sunday, September 02, 2007

Back in China

Here I am, after a month of relaxation and enjoyment in the US. I ate a whole bunch of stuff while I was there, too. Everything that's sweet in the US is just so much more sweet than anything in China, and as a result I ate them. Ate them all up. I was pleased to find that 3 of the Chinese teachers here commented on how fat I've gotten, and that I can no longer really fit into my pants that I left here.

I can already tell that I've begun to lose what I gained almost instantaneously. I'm not sure if that's a good thing, honestly. This kind of weight fluctuation might upset my homeostasis or something like that.

The time I spent at home was awesome, although I did nothing really while I was there. I just relaxed. It's easy to get lost in a loop of doing nothing around there, which was fine for me. But now that I'm back, I've started to think about why exactly I'm here.

This enters my mind nearly every day. Why am I here? Not, you know, here on this Earth. But literally, here in China? Some days I think it's because of the challenge, some days because I want to experience a vastly different culture, and some days I even think it's because things are often so absolutely absurd here that I can't help but laugh at it... to myself. That's right, sometimes I think I'm in China just to laugh at it. That makes people who come here just to some exotic Asian action seem more justified than me! Ok, maybe not.

I have never settled on one answer, and another thing that I constantly think about is that if I go to an interview, be it job or school, I know they're going to ask something similar. Why did you spend 2 years in China? What am I supposed to say? To find myself? To grow as a human person on this world? Or should I say that I'm impulsive and get bored often of one place to the point where I can't stay there for more than 2 years in a row without getting jittery. I'm sure they'd love to hear that when they ask where do I see myself in 5 years? "I have no freaking clue... um... South Africa? Maybe? Somewhere where this company ain't, I can tell ya that!". Yeah that will look really good.

I just hope that by the time I do interview somewhere, I'll have figured out what the hell I'm doing here. I mean, I think the problem is that there are too many reasons why I'm here. They keep coming to me, and every time I think of one, it's accurate and true. I can only think of a handful of reasons not to be here.

Anyway, classes start tomorrow and it should be exciting. I can't wait to see last year's bunch, and the new lot as well. I'm sure it will be a very interesting year.

4 comments:

Celera said...

Well, it was good to have you home for a little while, we miss you al...wait ... it's exactly the same!
Anyway, I'm glad you enjoyed your time off and can't wait to hear more about this year's students. Will any be named Celera? Or Laranna? I made a warrior named Valkrine, but that seems a little too Scandinavian.

Please, talk to me before you go on any job interviews. Yikes! Seriously, nobody in their right mind would need much convincing that it was a cool and valuable thing for you to go to China for two years. I would consider it an automatic plus, even at a boring insurance company like mine.

Cel

Maile said...

Hi Drew!

Good to see you posting again. All those red dots on your Clustr Map make me mad jealous (I've only just put one up). Good luck with the new year!

Maile

Anonymous said...

I thought you knew why you were there. It must have been your most recent trip home that made you question that. Maybe it made you realize that you miss us a little bit when you're away. We miss you. Hope all is going well at the start of the new school year. I missed not talking to you this weekend but we are back home now. We had a great time at the wedding being with old friends.
lovemom

Keiyla said...

Psssht, you're thinking too hard. It's easy. You went because you want to! Same reason I ate those fries last night. In fact, it could be argued thay anything a person does is because they want to- even if it's only because the alternatives or prices for other choices are unpleasant. So, are you truly asking yourself why you are there, or are you asking why you want to be there? Two completely different questions!

Also- I'm sorry I missed seeing you when you came back, but hope to chat with you again later. Have fun!